Come, Ye Disconsolate, Comfort, Compassion, Despair, discouragement, Uncategorized

Come, Ye Disconsolate

I remember many times in my life when I felt disconsolate. Nothing could console me in those times, no one could say the comforting words I needed to hear. It was as if grief had settled so deeply in my soul that nothing or no one could reach it, not even me. I survived such times throughout my life, but I might not have been able to without music.

I remember one time in particular when I was hospitalized. I was being rushed down the hallway on a gurney. I remember that I was cold. I remember being afraid. I remember seeing the lights on the ceiling. I remember tears. And I found myself whisper-singing these words, “Come, ye disconsolate, where’er ye languish.”

It is a beautiful hymn that is seldom sung in gatherings or in worship. It is by no means a happy hymn, but it speaks to a person in anguish, as it spoke to me that day. I invite you to read the lyrics.

Come, ye disconsolate, where’er ye languish;
Come to the mercy-seat, fervently kneel;
Here bring your wounded hearts, here tell your anguish,
Earth has no sorrow that heaven cannot heal.

Joy of the comfortless, light of the straying,
Hope of the penitent, fadeless and pure;
Here speaks the Comforter, tenderly saying—
Earth has no sorrow that heaven cannot cure.

Here see the Bread of Life; see waters flowing
Forth from the throne of God, pure from above;
Come to the feast of love; come, ever knowing
Earth has no sorrow but heaven can remove.

Lyrics: Thomas Moore (1779-1852); Altered by Thomas Hastings (1784-1872); Music: Samuel Webbe (1740-1816)

In the amazing art above, a woman is shedding golden tears. Perhaps the art is saying, “God sees your tears as golden, cherished and priceless.” When I think no one sees my tears or cares about them, I remember that. And I remember this . . .

You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book. —Psalm 56:8 (NLT)

As you listen to this audio, may this beautiful hymn bring you some quiet moments.

Uncategorized

A Friend You Can Be Sure Of

You don’t have to be alike to be friends.

It’s true! We don’t have to be alike to be friends. The drawing above illustrates that well: an ordinary old barnyard chicken, and a beautifully crowned Ugandan Crested Crane, Uganda’s national bird.

I spoke today with two of my favorite people of all time. We are scattered across the country, which made our conversations even sweeter. These two are “friends I can be sure of.” You may recall some of the Winnie the Pooh stories and their simple, solid wisdom.

On a walk together, Piglet sided up close to Pooh. (Pooh might have wondered what Piglet was up to.) I love this conversation between them:

“Pooh? whispered Piglet, moving right up close to Piglet’s side.

Yes, Piglet? said Pooh, wondering why Piglet wanted to be so close.

Piglet responded, “I just wanted to make sure of you.”

I cherish friends I can be sure of, and my phone calls this week were with two of my very favorite friends, one of them a friend from childhood. These are the sort of friendships I most cherish. Over miles and miles of separation, after years of friendship over the miles, hearing their voices is still a gift.

An old saying that is so true is “Make new friends but keep the old, those are silver, these are gold.” Reaching across the miles and hearing a familiar voice is one of life’s greatest treasures.

This is what I would call a lightweight post, nothing too earth shattering, but there are important lessons we can cling to, especially when times are rough. Here’s one lesson: we don’t have to be alike to be friends. If we learn that lesson, I imagine that the world would be a safer, kinder place.

The primary lesson from the Winnie the Pooh story is to cherish our friends, to keep them close, to stay in touch across years and miles. Someday when you and I are older and less independent, we might just need a kind voice to cheer us on.

It happened for me today!

Uncategorized

When Words Are Too Hard

Haberdoedas For Unsplash

If you know me, then you know that I’m never at a loss for words. Until now! This could be a three-sentence post!

You know as well as I do that I will go beyond three sentences. So what do I want to share with you today, my friends. I guess I want to contemplate the hard words, the hardest words. Let me offer a few.

I’m sorry. I apologize. It was my fault. Why did you do that? Get out of my sight. You are wrong! You are insane! You are nothing!

I suppose it all boils down to the hardest, most hurtful, words: You are nothing! Sometimes the world gives us that message. Sometimes we get that message from those we hate. Sometimes our heart breaks because the person who says, “You are nothing” is the person we most most. It is a beating down, in a way. It is using words to disrespect and devalue a person until what they believe about themselves becomes a serious emotional place to be. “Forced to the ground” is one way to describe it.

I have been there once or twice. You probably have been there too. Using words is one of the most powerful ways to force a person onto the ground and face first in the mud. It holds its own violence and control over another person.

The deepest, most devastating, violence for me has been a constant barrage of words that were meant to rob me of my very self, inside and out.

So words can be lethal. They can hurt and they can push me to the ground, so that I would feel lower and lower. I know how difficult it is to get up to your knees and then stand. I always remember this wise little saying, “Sticks and stones can break my bones, but words can never hurt me!”

Remembering the sting of the sharp pebbles under my knees, I push on up feeling the strain of the muscles in my thighs. Pushing harder and harder, and demanding my knees to straighten up, I rise to my feet!

One last word of encouragement …

“Stand tall, laugh loudly, and be who you truly are.” — Sark

Uncategorized

Who Stole My Dream?

That’s right, they stole my dream— my cousins and my brother. I have to admit that an accusation of familial theft is an exaggeration on my part, but you know that being left out of a family gathering stings a little. Or hurts a lot! No child wants to be on a playground shouting, “Wait for me!” when their friends run away and leave them in the dust!

So the truth—they did not steal my dream, they just reminded me that I passed up many of my dreams throughout my lifetime. And yes, I cried until my eyes hurt! After all, they did take a two-week trip to Greece to the most beautiful beaches in the country, Kefalonia, and I could not go. You have to understand that all through my childhood my Aunt Koula and my grandmother, Yiayia, told me about Kefalonia. Sometimes my Aunt Koula would cry because she missed her homeland so deeply. She would quickly dry her tears and blow her nose and then she would tell me with certainty that we would go to Greece together. We never did!

Now I must be honest, most of the time when they reminisced about Kefalonia, I was not really interested. I have no idea what they said about it! Did they swim there and bask in the sunlight? Did they go into the salt water to heal skin conditions? Did they dance there and fall in love there? I never knew, but I do know they instilled a dream in me of going to Kefalonia some day. I didn’t!

So what am I trying to say here? Just that God or the universe gives us just so much time. We don’t ever know how much time, so my point is follow every dream you have. Forget the bucket list you’re filling for retirement! Move now!

Holy Scripture usually doesn’t skimp or shrink back from words . . .

To everything there is a season and for every purpose under heavens . . .

2 A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted;

3 A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up;

4 A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;

5 A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;y

6 A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away;

7 A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;

8 A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace.

~ Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 KJV

So I missed my time most of the time; so what? I’ve missed quite a few dreams through the years, but I also have seen my dreams come true, many of them! Sometimes I am a lot like Tinkerbell or any number of Disney characters! I believe in magic and miracles, because I have experienced so much of it,

No doubt, I’m a dreamer, not a time keeper! That can cause me problems when I have an appointment or some other critical societal constriction. Remember, I’m about magic and miracles!

Even if my family went to Kefalonia and left me behind, I bet I know more about that stunning place than they do because of my grandmother’s and my Aunt Koula’s lively, poignant, beautiful stories! I was given a gift of grace because of their stories and the precious and plentiful time I spent with them.

One more thing . . .

Follow your heart when a dream shows itself to you!

Freedom, Midterms, Soul Freedom

A Critical Season

We are living in a critical season in so many ways— economy, cost of food and fuel and other life essentials. There are no easy solutions. Democracy is fragile. Our freedoms are fragile. So I can throw up my hands in despair that my one vote won’t change anything. Or we can raise our hands together, make ourselves visible and claim our rights if they are threatened. It’s as simple as that, or it is as hard as any critical struggle can be.

So I plan to hold on tightly to every freedom in hopes of sharing it with you. I remember a phrase used much during my seminary days. It is “soul freedom.” That’s the way I think of freedom, to do, and to be who I am.

Believe me, I am holding tightly to freedom. I have it in my clutched hands and I protect it from every threat /with all my strength. It’s important, my freedom, important enough to fight for! So, again, I say, “We can throw our hands up in despair.” Or we can raise our hands together in solidarity and with resolve.

Allison Saeng for Unsplassh

The midterm elections cry out for solidarity. I’m not just referring to one vote. It’s about the importance inside of the vote. What freedom might that single vote hold!

Follow after freedom! Be watchful at the polling place to ensure everyone is able to vote. Offer rides to those who don’t have transportation. Remind everyone you know to vote. Remind yourself about your responsibility and mine to strive for “a more perfect union. Lift your hands in resolve, in faith, in prayer, in celebration, in peace, in freedom, in the cherished liberty granted to all the people!

All of that — faith, resolve, prayer, freedom — is buried deep inside one vote.

Uncategorized

When Holding On Is Holy Enough OR Tie a Knot in the Rope and Hang On

Vincent Valdez, The Rope, (After Marsden Hartley), 2018, oil pastel on paper, Private Collection.

Today I read the weekly newsletter from my good friend’s church in D.C. I love reading her weekly writing because it always lifts me up above and beyond any current trouble I’m feeling. Today, a phrase caught my eye and my imagination. Here it is: “When Holding On Is Holy Enough.”


Wow! Just wow! That phrase caught me and held on. I couldn’t get it out of my mind. I suppose it’s because I feel like I’ve been struggling to hang on my whole life. From childhood abuse, to peer abuse, to relationship abuse, family abuse, and church abuse, and the abuse that left my body without a kidney. Of course, this is just a sweeping description. I endured many other kinds of abuse through the years and all of it was woven into the fabric that held me together.

My dearest friend used to tell me to “tie a knot in the rope and hang on” every time I felt like I would fall to the ground. The rope frayed, and frayed some more, but it never broke apart. Neither did I fall and hit the ominous ground below me. Somehow though, holding on was enough. I did not fall from the rope and I didn’t break apart. And holding on really was “holy enough.”

Photo by Robert Zunikoff on Unsplash

Of course, the fabric of my life was tattered and torn at times, but also repaired, put back together and stitched up with golden thread. That’s what was holy enough. That’s what was the grace of it all — the golden thread sewn into my tattered and torn life to repair it and restore it. 

I don’t know what kind of faith you might have, and most of the time, I don’t know much about my own faith. But if we — you and I — could muster up just enough faith inside of ourselves to believe in a God that can “fix” us when we’re torn apart, we will have opened our arms to grace. That will be holy enough.

I want to do that.


Uncategorized

What’s In a Name? My Name to be exact: Kalliope!

These days lots of folks are asking me what it means and where did it come from. Kalliope. It came from Athens, Greece with a force. The force was that tradition never gave me a choice, just a mandate that I would bear the name of a mysterious grandmother, far away, in the “old country” I guess! I never, ever wanted that name, but tradition gave me no choice: the first-born girl would be named after her paternal grandmother. End of discussion! I was an infant anyway. I could hardly push back.

Two life lessons: 1. If you’re a baby and can’t change names, let it go, and 2. When you’re grown never let anything go, push pack with all your might. Because this world thrives on patriarchy at the expense of you and me! Stand up and speak up for justice for others and speak up for justice for yourself! You deserve it!

Pleasant, Easy Moments, Rest, Restoration

An Easy, Pleasant Day

Art created by George C. with Unsplash

I am due for an easy, pleasant day. Past days have been trying with chronic pain, lots of pills to take, infusions and injections, relationship problems, and lots of hard cooking with my trusty sidekick Ethel. If you’re not acquainted with Ethel, she’s my power wheelchair that helps me in the kitchen. She will lift me up twelve whole inches, so that I can stir, chop, wash and reach! When I don’t have enough strength and stamina to cook, I get Ethel out of her parking place and slowly go down the hall to the kitchen trying desperately not to crash into anything. I have to tell you, if Ethel crashes into something straight on, it doesn’t survive. 

So far I’ve been lucky: I only crashed into the stove, the loveseat, and the kitchen island, which didn’t break, but did get pushed across the floor. The worse crash was yesterday, when I ran over the cat’s food dish. It made the most terrible noise while stuck under Ethel’s big tires. Fred had to help us make several driving maneuvers to get it out. It didn’t break; what do you think about 50 year old, “unbreakable” Corning Ware!

Back to my easy day… I’ll write in my blog, play the piano awhile, put my undercooked cabbage from yesterday on the stove on low all day, have our traditional Happy Hour of fruit juices and ginger ale, and eat watermelon! That’s it! My easy day planned, hoping not to get unplanned things forced all through it. My goal for today is to keep it easy and pleasant.

How beautiful and pleasant you are, O loved one, with all your delights. 
~ Song of Solomon 7:6 ESV

I don’t get many easy days when I don’t have doctor’s visits, hard decisions to contemplate, grandchildren to pine over, and friends to miss. I have to create pleasant places for myself whenever I can, finding space to enjoy the delights of life.

The lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; indeed, I have a beautiful inheritance. 
~ Psalm 16:6 ESV

Finding spaces that are easy and pleasant I will do, no doubt. I can plan a respite time every once in a while, consider the flowers, look up into the blue sky, feel the warmth of the sun, and think on all that is easy and pleasant. God would approve.

Inner peace, peace, Prayer

“Just a Little Talk with Jesus”

If you’re old enough, or from a certain part of the country, you might remember the Gospel song, “Just a Little Talk With Jesus” It’s about praying to Jesus, telling him “all about your troubles” and knowing that he will hear your faintest cry,” meaning prayer. Our thought might be, yours and mine and that of millions of people, that this is all too simple to be true. With our more high church traditions, we have moved beyond simple prayer to begging, pleading, fasting, lamenting, beseeching and all other manner of prayer.

And it gets us nowhere!

Art: Sampo Kaikkonen


I am discovering that lots of people these days have no need for prayer; they don’t do it, or believe in its power, or count on the fact that it can change their lives. Truth is, many everyday people truly need their lives changed, but have no confidence at all that prayer can actually change anything.

If you think I am about to launch into a string of words on prayer, like a sermon or an object lesson or a devotional, all meant to change your opinion about prayer, you would be wrong. After all though, I am an ordained minister. Convincing is what ministers do! But convincing you of anything about the importance of prayer is the last thing I want to do. Each person must decide that for herself, or his self.

Let there be an opening into the quiet that lies beneath the chaos, where you find the peace you did not think possible and see what shimmers within the storm.

~John O’ Donohue

I would dare to conjecture that there is no time in history that needed prayer and peace any more than our current time in history. When we look back on today in a decade, we will see farmers losing their crops, businesses losing their solvency, families losing each other, races still warring, LGBTQI+ folks still struggling, poverty still having its way, elders finding no support when they need it, juvenile justice centers incarcerating hundreds of young people, wars among political parties, wars among races, wars among tribes, wars among nations.

Not a clear path to peace to be sure. Swords have not yet been made into plowshares or swords into pruning hooks. (Isaiah 2:4) The wolf is not lying peacefully with that sweet baby lamb we see in all the pictures and figurines, the beautiful image of “the peaceable kingdom.” We need that in these days, in our cities and towns, churches and schools, in our homes and in our hearts.

May it be so.

Alone, Loneliness

Isolation

They said it would happen. Warning after warning after warning.

“The worse thing a senior person can do is isolate themselves.”

“The worst thing a senior can do is isolate themselves.”
It’s true. You draw inward and inward, while pushing others to the other section. Diagonal separation with one section, yours being very dark and the other with brighter colors.

Does that mean you have destroyed all the brightness in your life, permanently? Does it mean that, in the end, you are in the dark diagonal, alone? I don’t know the answer to either of those questions, really. But I am surrounded by darkness, and I am in fact alone.

You will have to decide for yourself. Will you stop doing those things that made you feel alive? Like singing and dancing, art and writing, creative things. Will you shove people out, one by one? Will you withdraw from the social things you once loved? From the people you once loved?

All of that, in my experience, is not hard to do. It happens quickly before you know it. Then you know finally, they were right: you’re alone, lonely, bored, despondent, trapped . . . Isolated!

Earthquake, Earthquake

When the Earth Quakes

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There are earthquakes that appear from the depths of the earth . . . And earthquakes that live in the depths of a soul, earthquakes of the heart and of the spirit.

The former destroys buildings and homes, and rearranges the earth . . . That kind of earthquake devastates and literally kills prople and animals. 500 found dead ~ most likely more by now. May God have mercy.

And then the earthquakes of the soul, the ones that bring great fear and mourning, much mourning. When one’s heart breaks as they keep vigil over a loved one . . . Or another grieves over a lost child . . . Or another mourns permanent loss that will leave pain in their hearts forever. May God have mercy.

“God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea.” ~Psalm 46:1-2:

God of extravagant mercy, help them to know your mercy even if your mercy doesn’t feel so extravagant. When the earth shakes beneath our feet, calm me from fear and shield me from harm. Keep my loved ones and me safe right now. Grant me peace in the middle of this chaos, and be our rock and protector. Amen.

God of the heavens, Creator of the earth, I come to you with my heart, seeking your divine protection. Wrap me in your steadfast love and shield me from harm. Guard our homes, our communities, our children, and those who are vulnerable. Give me wisdom and courage to help another person in need. Amen.

God of extravagant mercy, Christ our kind Redeemer, Spirit of wind and flame, and of moving earth: I come before you seeking mercy and protection. I pray for everyone in the affected areas. Comfort those who are frightened, injured, or grieving. Guide the hands of the first responders and rescue teams as they work to help those in need. In the Holy Name of Christ, Amen and amen.

Uncategorized

“I Can’t Pray That!”

As a hospital chaplain, many people over the years asked me to pray for them — for a loved one they care about, for an outcome they hope to see — but sometimes my heart whispers these words, “I can’t pray that.”


I plead with you, God, to heal his child from brain cancer.
“I can’t pray that!”

God, in your abundant mercy, heal this person’s suffering from this dreadful disease. “I can’t pray that!”

God, by the power of the Holy Spirit, raise this still born child to life. “I simply cannot pray that!”

And about the state of the world . . . prices for essential items soar; our country is in the midst of a senseless war; our farmers are languishing; our leaders are incompetent at best and corrupt at worse.

We pray, O God, for peace, an almost impossible peace, for you alone can end the wars and the rumors of wars, and your everlasting grace can restore our longed-for peace.

Rejoice in hope, be patient in affliction, be constant in prayer. Romans 12:12

Uncategorized

When Important Things Break

Labyrinth Breaking


I love labyrinths. I love walking them, gazing at them, collecting them, even making them out of glue and paper. If it is true how people explain labyrinths, I have been witness to it. A labyrinth is not a maze. One cannot get lost in a labyrinth. A labyrinth’s path will lead you into a place of spiritual understanding. You can linger there, but you cannot stay forever. The path that led you in will lead you out the same way. For me, the lingering part, the center of the labyrinth raises my spiritual consciousness and prods me to learn more about myself.

I call the labyrinth my “sacred path,” a path that can either leave me whole and filled with sacred thoughts or it can leave me broken as I discover things about myself that I did not know before. Most likely, though, the sacred path will move me toward wholeness and joy, and brokenness of spirit. Both! Looking at a part of who I am, and looking towards the person I want to be.

Some people meet God inside a labyrinth. In my experience, God is present with me on my sacred path teaching me what is right and good, what is of the Holy Spirit and what is merely of the world’s evils. Like most people, both good and evil occupy my life and shape my very being. No wonder there is dichotomy in me and I am constantly torn about the way of the Sacred Path.

But this labyrinth is made of stone, stone that is not easily breakable. It is very disconcerting to me that a stone labyrinth would break apart. I see in it the impermanence of all things. I see it in the fleeting existence of all things, in destructive forces that have power over things, and in the fragility of all things. So I see my own fragility. If a stone labyrinth can break, I imagine I can break, too. As always, the labyrinth’s sacred path teaches and leads, embracing my mind throughout a meandering journey on so sacred a path.

What am I trying to say? That I am just as vulnerable as everyone else. My “superior spirituality’ is a kind of farce, an absurdity that convinces me of my power against evil and my penchant for all things good. Hogwash! Like every one of God’s beloveds, I am half & half, half evil and half good in an ever-fluctuating mess of humanity! So sometimes I love my good self and sometimes I see the evil in me I so detest.

Believe me! A trip into a labyrinth, following its sacred path, can change you and help you face off against your personal mess of humanity. But into the labyrinth? Well, it’s definitely worth the price of admission, but make sure you choose a time before you or the labyrinth breaks apart!

All Shall Be Well, Transcendence, Transformation, Uncategorized

Waiting for Spiritual Awakening

What image might you see in a moment of spiritual awakening? Not that you or I have that many spiritual awakening moments! They are few and far between in my world. Still, they do slip into my life from time to time, and for that I am grateful.

What if I looked harder for one, tried to be still enough and silent enough for an awakening to embrace my soul? And where in the universe would I look? I think the answer is to settle down in a comfortable place and peruse your sources. For me the sources might be nature, art, poetry, and music. I need only to search those places with a wide open heart and a soul that can see and hear beyond all the everyday, normal things.

Photo by Blake Verdoorn for Unsplash

Often I substitute the idea “spiritual awakening “ with another word, Transformation. How would I be transformed while standing on a bridge over a stunning waterfall? Or sitting peacefully at the bottom and feeling the waterfall’s gentle mist? I look for transformation everywhere, every day, and I find it when I least expect it.

Or rather transformation finds me! But does it pile up, transformation after transformation, and take up its home in my soul and spirit? Or does every transforming gift stay in my heart forever? That suggests to me that each transformative grace becomes a living part of me, and I would change a little, every time. Transformation’s presence would be nearer to me than every breath I take.

All shall be well, and all shall be well,

and all manner of thing shall be well.

— Julian of Norwich, 14th Century

So what do I find in a mountain waterfall surrounded by green? That question is easy to answer. I find beauty, power, amazement, presence, resurrection, renewal, faith, hope, new birth, and transformation that measures every breath I take.

Today transformation is a breathtaking waterfall. I don’t know about tomorrow! Amen.

Uncategorized

Not Without a Song

All of my life, I have relied on music to help me endure times of sorrow. Music can lift my spirit when I’m melancholy, and can comfort my soul when I am in sorrow and trouble. I was sexually abused as a child ~ not once, but again and again and again I was sucked into a cycle of power and abuse by a single perpetrator. I survived childhood somehow, I never acknowledged how music deeply touched my soul with a message of consolation.

I discovered good things about the healing power of music as I grew older, but it wasn’t until I faced a terminal illness that I embraced music as a tender healer, my tender healer. End Stage Kidney Disease, five years of dialysis, a kidney transplant, and a grueling recovery and rehabilitation time brought me to my knees. Somewhere in my illness, before the transplant, I discovered out of nowhere that I had lost my voice. I had taken my vocal cords for granted.

A life-long singer actually lost her ability to sing – completely and utterly. Only a squeaky croak came out when she tried. She was left without a song!

In all those years when I couldn’t sing, I felt as though something in me was dying—something soulful, something sacred, something significant. Something life-giving! I experienced deep pain, the pain that comes from a death of heart and spirit.

“Without a Song” is a popular song composed by Vincent Youmans, with lyrics later added by Billy Rose and Edward Eliscu, published in 1929. It is one of my long-time favorite ballads from the Musical Play, “Great Day.” “Without a Song” has been present in my music memory for decades! I bring it out when I am disconsolate. It is timeless, published twenty years before I was born. Listen to it on YouTube if you can, and ponder its message here.

Without a song the day would never end
Without a song the road would never bend
When things go wrong a man ain’t got a friend
Without a song


I got my trouble and woe but, sure as I know, the Jordan will roll 
I’ll get along as long as a song is deep in my soul.

I’ll never know what makes the rain to fall
I’ll never know what makes that grass so tall
I only know there ain’t no love at all
Without a song

Oliver Wendell Holmes once lamented, “Alas, for those that never sing, but die with all their music in them.” 

I could not help but ask myself . . . Would I die with all my music in me? Or would I be so profoundly touched by “the sweet power of music” that I would “bring [my] music forth into the air” through singing? (Shakespeare)

Finally, let me tell you the outcome of this story. In 2015, I lost my song, literally, and could not sing a single note. How I grieved that loss! How I languished without a song! I had many discussions with those who know and the most common answer for me was, “You have damaged your vocal cords.” The most common suggestions for possible healing? “Rest your vocal cords as much as you possibly can. Do not try to sing at all! Use warm compresses when you can. Sip warm tea, never hot. Pray! This healing may take a very long time!”

So I lost my song sometime in 2016. I got my song back, in part, yesterday, April 7, 2026! I celebrated all day yesterday, sang songs, played the piano, and even danced (all by myself)! Do not try to survive your lost song, or anything else you’ve lost! You must live your best life, but never without a song.

Honor your life, your joy, yourself, and your vocal cords!

A frenzied life, Adventures, Becoming, Beloved Community, Bishop Steven Charleston, Calm, Committment, Community, Growing up, Life Journeys, Life pathways, Life’s meaning

FROM GENERATION TO GENERATION

GENERATIONS

MAY 6, 2026 ~ ANCESTORS! Along my journey, I started to believe that all my current projects related to my ancestors. Meandering through the generations was sometimes an exhausting journey! From generation to generation, I trudged through both the “beautiful and terrible” of my ancestors and my relationships with them. Relationships are not easy and never smooth, and I endured the sting of the prickles! But you can’t skip over that “ancestor thing” that tells you every day that your DNA and theirs are forever entwined. I cannot change that, so I determined to find peace around it. When someone says “you are just like your Aunt Eirene, I can’t refute it. It’s true! I must tell you that completion of the major parts of this memoir took a vast amount of energy and fortitude from me!

An era has passed. I have just completed writing this memoir of my life, after laboring for more than three years, far too long to be writing a book about your life journey. Writing one book for multiple years can mess up one’s mind! Examining the moments of my life snatched my joy for a good period. This memoir did not birth itself! Writing it was not really ordinary writing. Instead I “birthed” it through serious “labor pains” I had to breathe through, and without a midwife!

The memoir is not quite edited and tweaked enough to go to the publisher, but it’s close. I have some emotions leftover from the writing and creating. I needed to name my emotions in the writing process, and now I need to name the emotions that came with me back into the real world.

Of course melancholy would be my primary emotion. It may be the result of the exhaustion of writing. It may be regret or sadness when thinking about my ancestors. It may be about looking back at the relationships I cherished and the ones that were chock full of sorrow, anger, disappointment, etc. No one, in my opinion, can walk away from the stories of their “beautiful and terrible” lives unscathed.

Be at peace, my good friend, for there is nothing your worries can do but make you tired. What will be, will be, shaped by currents deeper and stronger than we can swim against. Instead of flailing in time, let us trust in what is without time: the steadfast presence of the sacred in the midst of our struggle. That is our lifeline, trust in a power unseen but felt to the marrow of the soul. Hold on to that firm hand and be at peace as it takes you to calmer water. ~Bishop Steven Charleston

I have to say that writing my “Spirit Stories” as I call them was an unforgettable undertaking of both personal reflection, as well as reflection on the place of my ancestors in my life and make peace with that and breath of my ancestors. The stories revealed themselves to me and I recorded them as if they were a writ of ancestry, or I might call it a sacred document, because every part of it required a chunk of my heart.

My burning question is “what will I do with myself now?” Today, I sorted some jewelry and pressed some shirts. Since I retired and faced serious illness, I get “kind of” dressed up on some days: hair, makeup, jewelry and clothes that look decent! I did today, in black leggings and a bright pink shirt, because I felt I should mark the day in some way, celebrating the completion of this book, “Spirit Stories: A sMeandering Memoir from My Sacred Path.”

I think now I will find a grassy, peaceful meadow and fall asleep beside a flowing stream in the verdant grass with a scattering of colorful wildflowers.

P.S~ If I fall asleep in this field of dandelions, I will regret it!

God's presence, God’s beloved daughter, peace, Peace on earth, Rev. Kathy Manis Findley, Soul work, Tikkun Olam, Uncategorized, War, War on Children

Let There Be Peace on Earth

4 He will judge between the nations
    and will settle disputes for many peoples.
They will beat their swords into plowshares
    and their spears into pruning hooks.
Nation will not take up sword against nation,
    nor will they train for war anymore.

~Isaiah 2:4 ~ New International Bible ~