On some days, I need help getting through the day. A part of my chronic illness includes days when I feel depressed and useless. I long for my former life that was so filled with what I remember as holy work. Counseling a victim of violence, working with an abused child, speaking on violence and victimization at conferences and conventions, being on boards of national organizations . . . It all felt like sacred work.
To be honest, I really acted as if I could do all of that on my own. I didn’t really need God to help me, though I know that was not the truth.
These days are very different. I do need God in so many ways, just to make it through the darker days. I need God to show me what my holy work is for these slow and quiet days. I need God to help keep me healthy and functioning.
When I most need God, Psalm 121 is my anchor. One of the most beautiful passages in the Bible, this Psalm reminds us that we have only to look up into the mountains to find God’s help, and that he keeps us safe without slumber or sleep.
Psalm 121 (KJV)
I will lift up mine eyes unto the hills, from whence cometh my help.
My help cometh from the Lord, which made heaven and earth.
He will not suffer thy foot to be moved: he that keepeth thee will not slumber.
Behold, he that keepeth Israel shall neither slumber nor sleep.
The Lord is thy keeper: the Lord is thy shade upon thy right hand.
The sun shall not smite thee by day, nor the moon by night.
The Lord shall preserve thee from all evil: he shall preserve thy soul.
The Lord shall preserve thy going out and thy coming in from this time forth, and even for evermore.